Sunday, September 29, 2002

I don't think I have a problem. Actually, I know I don't. Freud might disagree, but screw Freud! He knows nothing about women anyway...

My problem, or non-problem as it may be, is that I seem to have a thing for guys named Mike: my first boyfriend was a Mike; the two guys I'm really attracted to at the moment are Mikes; a guy I was attracted to over the summer was a Mike. Okay. That's interesting, right? But unlikely, no. "Michael" and its derivations are common male monikers. Weirdly, though, is that my father's name is Mike. Gah! ::Natalie shudders::

This is where I reiterate my aforementioned sentiment, SCREW FREUD! I am so not a Daddy's girl!!!! I don't want to date any guy like my father! Not that my dad's a bad guy to be like. On the whole, it's quite the contrary. It's just that I feel he doesn't respect my ideas and opinions, my independence. Nothing pisses me off more than closemindedness.

Mr Ex had a tendency to be closeminded. It was a tendency that reared its ugly head with increasing frequency towards the end of our relationship. He actually told me that he didn't want to see a band that I liked because he thought they looked "like nerds"!!!!! Gah! ::Natalie waves right fist in the air in a brief spasm of anger::

But back to my original point, gah! Or wait! Maybe it was SCREW FREUD???? 'Cause you know what? This wouldn't be an issue for me if it wasn't for him! I wouldn't be embracing this fit of paranoia--or rather, it wouldn't be embracing me--if it wasn't for the power of his suggestion. I know in my heart that there's nothing to it; "Michael" is a popular name. There are bound to be coincidences. I guess what I have to do now is stop obsessing about it. When you obsess over things, scrutinize your relationships for things that just aren't there, well, you poison the very relationships you're looking at.

A warning sign
I missed the good part then I realised
That I started looking and the bubble burst
I started looking for excuses

-"Warning Sign" by Coldplay

Bottom line is this: if I get hung up on this name thing, I'm afraid that I'll close myself off to potential relationships. Just because of what Freud may think is in a name. And wouldn't that be a real problem!

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