Saturday, March 15, 2003

I feel like such a bad activist. There was another anti-war protest going on here today. And, once again, I had to miss it. The last time, I missed it because I went home for the weekend. The time before that--homework. This time? Prepping for Monday's midterm (what an inopportune time to write a midterm! And less than a month before the final, too!)

I haven't been to an anti-war protest since November.

And I feel guilty for that.

I know I shouldn't. Not really. I mean, I know in my heart what a believe and it's not like I keep my opinions to myself. By word of mouth, I've tried to promote the protests I couldn't attend. And I've pontificated here.

So why do I still feel guilty?

Because I think I should be doing more. Because I know I need to do more. Because I hold the impossibly arrogant/idealistic opinion that I can change the world, that one person can make a difference. Because I feel that if I don't do something, no one will.

Because I'm fortunate enough to be born in Canada. Because I'm fortunate enough to have a roof over my head and food in my belly. Because I have family and friends who love me. Because I have an education. Because I have the freedom to think and, what's more, to share what's on my mind.

Because I live in a country that is at peace.

And I'm grateful for all of that. I truly am. But I will always feel regret, knowing that not everyone is so lucky. And I will always feel that, due to my charmed upbringing (yes, I had a wonderful childhood, too!), I am in debt to the world. I've always had so much. Of not necessarily the material things, but the things that really matter.

I need to get out there. I need to do something. But still I know. Protests aren't enough.

Though awareness is certainly a start.

Listening to "Sing" by Travis:
"For the love you bring won't mean a thing unless you sing, sing, sing."

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